me only

2009-12-02T13:59:00.001+08:00

i have moved.^^

http://foxypurps.blogspot.com

2009-11-09T19:05:00.002+08:00

exams are finally over.
but once again.. the "lost" feelings are back..its like suddenly you have no sense of direction what to do next.
and im back to working full time at the clinic again starting from tml.. kinda dread it. cos im sick and tired of smiling for the patients. looks like i do not have choice. i'll treat it like im doin my part for the society: looking after sick patients.

addicted to reading manga..ahhh..! i finished reading all 60+ chapters within a week..
when jb with my dino and frens..didnt really enjoy it cause of some people which i do not really like..seriously. i dunno why.. leepeng is refusing to make friends. and she treats new and people she doesnt know as -alien. not willing to break down the barrier and socialise. hm..what's wrong with me?

leepeng doesnt seems to have much friends.
so far after exams..none of her friends have called her out. or even msg her.
but its alright that way too.. at least no one will listen to her rubbish..and get ps..just because she works all the time. at least in this way she can focus on working to earn money for her school fees.

sigh..*envy rich pple and those pple that do not need to work and still can get on with school life comfortably..*

this sem's sch was seriously hell for leepeng..
dreading next sem already..

2009-11-04T15:42:00.001+08:00

An article about "The Ex Texter"

There's nothing wrong with being friends and keeping in touch with your ex, but too much contact can prove detrimental to future relationships.

“When you continue an emotional relationship with someone instead of letting go, you will usually have subconscious feelings for them or realise that the feelings never went away, which can be damaging to new or potential relationships,”..

hmm..exactly my thoughts.

2009-10-26T21:54:00.001+08:00

its almost halloween, the spiderwebs and dust collected here should be just perfect for the occasion.

2009-07-02T15:49:00.002+08:00

i watched Transformers2 on tues. gosh, its super good. i wanna watch it again.
i love all the bikes and cars in the show. soo shiny n new. And the best part is.. they are all auto-pilot enabled.. whichs means u dun have to worry about focusing on the road all the time. How cool is that!

Work..sucks. kills my life. esp the social part. i feel so stranded..like alien living on this planet. serving its purpose of working for the unwell human beings. with the H1N1 on the rise in singapore. i guess we have to prepare for the worse. Fully equiped. i hate that part. the N95 mask is already giving me many unwanted pimples. but for the sake of my own safety and the patients' safety. ive no choice but the adhere by the rules and policies.

crap. i just realised sch started ytd. oh no. i just skipped 2 days of sch..teacher taught 3 chapters alr. i feel dAmn Horrible.

no mood.

2009-05-25T12:28:00.002+08:00

time flies real fast..soon, i will starting the last year of uni.
i must enjoy sch life before its over. so much to do. so little time.

besides, now that im working full time at the clinic. i will have even lesser time to do the thing i want. What to do..for the sake of my sch fees. im really envious of those that no need to work, can enjoy and yet living their life to the fullest. not born with a spoon in my mouth sometimes really sucks. not to say those born with a silver or gold spoon in their mouth..wonder what is it like to be like them. on contrary..i rather not be like them. they seems to be stuck up in certain ways. they just cant seems to understand the life of those who have to work hard for the money no matter how mature or understanding they are. there are some things they will never understand unless they really experience it. recently, ive this really f-up rich fren of my that hurt me real bad with words. he said that im not interested in my studies and shld just quit sch to work full time. and even if i quit sch and work full time. i can never survive and earn much. WTFH. i didn't call up the sch cos i was working full-time. by the time i end work..office hours are over. if i could call the sch on my own, i wouldnt need to even call him and ask. he said i shld call on my own. he said im nt interested in my studies. can even skip my paper...come on man..i had stomache ache..and i rushed to sch fr my paper. if i wasn't interested i cld have stayed at hm and gotten an MC straight. why bother to rush down and argue with them to let me take my paper. that f-up guy will nvr understand what is it like to work for his own sch fees cos his parents f-ing fed him. so what if he's 29 this year and working n studying at the same time too.. he's working in his family business..wanna take leave for sch purposes...easy..just go..im sure own family will allow. no need to work looking at other ppl mood like me.and like WTFH..who is he to condemn me to not surviving in the society. if we both are given the same condition to work in. i bet i will survive better than him. and he's even more not serious than me okay..his project and assignments all sucks. he's in uni for more than 6 yrs(loser huh..he think Primary sch ar?! study 6 yrs to grad) and until now he doesnt even know how to do referencing.that is like the most basic for all assignments. know why? he PAYS ppl to do work for him or he BUYS their work.. like WTFH again.. rich can like that ar? he's even more freaking not serious in his sch work. he just wanna fucking pass and get out of uni...maybe cos he's been stuck in uni for WAY TOO FREAKING LONG?! whatever it is.. he's not fit to be my fren anymore. a true friend doesnt condemn one another. true friends encourage and pulls you up from the pit.

pissed off by him.

think of something happier..when i get my first pay..im gonna take 65 bucks out to spend.
on what?.......WAKEBOARDING...!!:)

2009-05-15T05:14:00.002+08:00

Don't you think my honey is soo cute?

like a small boy forcing a smile for the camera. haha..

so silly, really love this boy.

i need you to talk my hand and walk with me.

step by step..slowly down the road. though we may trip and fall..its the time and effort we take to help each other up that counts. the heart we put in to care for each other and look at each other's imperfection as though it's the most perfect thing in the world. like that imperfection is the best thing that could be and it makes you unique for who you are.

however..somehow or rather, i feel sad..

when was the last time..you slowed down to take time to even look at my blog? or take the initiative to understand me and know me better? what do i really want?

or even care to ask me..how are you? what have you been thinking of lately? are you picking up the signals i am sending to you? or must i really tell everything straight to your face that i need this, i want this, i feel sth, i think sth..? when was the last time you came to support me and my passion? when was the last time you gave encouragement to me to pursue my passion? or are you doin things based on what you think is good for me but not what i think is good for me? are you restricting me cos you think i will be better that way or cos i will be happier that way? am i happy with my life now?

are you doin things you think for my own good yet not considering how i feel..

what happened to the "don't worry..i understand..i know what kind of person you are..of cos i will give you your freedom.."

things always become different when a couple gets tgt.

i feel like im not the old purple anymore..

im boon's purple. The purple that boon carved her to be. the old purple has been changed to sth that boon wants her to be..carved according to boon's own image of purple.

so which purple am i supposed to be?

who am i?

2009-05-12T04:09:00.001+08:00

im having holis now..or rather..waiting for my last paper. sian. dunno whether can take a not..if cannot means fail liao..sian..

anyone got job to intro me? i need money for my sch fees next sem!! help!!

2009-05-05T21:11:00.000+08:00

Definition of bad, seriously fucked up day: Today.

2009-04-23T02:33:00.002+08:00

i feel so lonely.always cant find ppl to talk to when im feeling down.
i need a bf. my bf. sometimes i think that what i really need is a robot. not a bf. i need the person to always be there whenever i need him.wont be tired, wont complain, wont be impatient..etc...but the world is fair. robots do not have emotions.real emotions.hai. i dunno what i rumbling about.

today, after giving cindy my miaow miaow. i realised how much i needed it. i felt so lonely without it. today when i felt emo, sad, need someone to talk to.. miaow miaow wasnt there,, i couldnt stroke its soft fur..to make me feel better.. ):

i think im retarded. i need my soft toys. they comfort me..cos bf n frens cannot always be by ur side like a soft toy.

i feel frustrated n angry and impatient.. i need miaow miaow. i wanted my bf. but he wasnt here for me again. now both gone. argh.cant blame bf. he tired. slp liao.

my eye infection just making me feel worse. knn ccb...nn..
feel like crying..called sister..he also no pick up.soo late liao..call the rest also like not right.hai.
im still alone afterall.

2009-04-16T23:21:00.002+08:00

ive been eating damn a lot recently.
stress. i seems to have become familiar with this word.
it has been pestering me ever since the recession started.

i wonder if i put on weight or grew chubby.
i miss all my sec sch frens.. my poly frens..and my hard core clubbing and drinking buddies..my overseas besties.i wonder how have life been for them.. are they becoming successful? are they doing good? or are they like me..struggling with life. can u imagine...ever since we hit the big 2. life has been moving very fast. its like suddenly, everyone is graduating. everyone's getting a job, everyone's is going overseas to further themselves, everyone's like getting bfs n gfs, everyone's like growing up soo fast. in a few yrs time, some may even be housewife, successful biz people, married.. having their own life. its like almost impossible to go back to where we all started. being tgt and having fun..thats y we must treasure every moment tgt..cos no one knows what the future holds. i rmb telling my bbf that let time tell what will happen in the future. who knows..maybe he might even marry b4 me..i recently met many of my old frens.. i learnt to treasure every moment..to even make the effort to meet up. i don't wanna be a drifter anymore..or rather try not to be one.

in like 1 1/2 yrs time.. i may be working in the real world alr..which means there are many things i cant do.. i wanna enjoy uni life.. do things im able to do now.like join ccas... have fun with my frens.. study while i still can..
i wanna continue to do martial arts, dance, run, wakeboard, play vball, be a slacker..cause i know, when i start work; i wont be able to get many chances to do so anymore. and i may be too old for it too.. not flexible enough in the future when i wanna do them.

i when to work tdy..helping graduating students wear their gown for their graduation ceremony...so many ppl..so many gowns..so many pins...so many pokes on my fingers.so painful.i swear im soo gonna be successful that i do not need to help them put on their gowns in the future..but them help me carry my things ard. pathethic. im gonna try my best. and be the best i can be.

last week nvr allocate one day for me..this week's date..im still waiting for it. i doubt it will come again. am i very demanding?

2009-04-04T19:09:00.002+08:00

i see dust collecting on this blog already..time for some updates.

Uni life sucks...i meant the exam and studying part only.
other than that, im having lotsa fun.
dance and wakeboard...can never get enough of them.

i went down to try my new Shane 07 board. omg..i fell in love with it instantly, the feeling while riding on it is indescribable. Its better than sex i think.hahaha...like everytime i cross the wake and do my tricks can cum many many times...the speed and the power came unexpectedly too.
i feel powerful! hahaha...

as for dance. our challenge for dancing comtemporary dance for the danceworks 2009 competition is finally over. we won the artistic merit award and i also won myself a back injury during the competition when i stepped on dry ice from the previous team on the stage. luckily the mistake wasn't obvious.

now.. my main focus is studies. but somehow i cant seems to be able to get myself to study. always distracted. and i hate recession. it hit me hard too.. as i feel so broke recently.

2009-02-12T00:14:00.003+08:00

L is for the way you. look at me
O is for the only. one I see
V is very, very. extraordinary
E is even more than anyone that you adore can
Love is all that I can. give to you
Love is more than just a game for two
Two in love can make it
Take my heart and please don't break it
Love was made for me and you

Valentines' day coming..but i don't feel excited or wad..i dun feel the overwhelming love i should feel with vday's approach. maybe cause i already know there will be no surprise factor. not much to celebrate. cos celebration will always end up more frustrated trying to plan and think of what to do next. but think of it..im contented. as long as ive my honey by my side.. everyday can be valentines' day if he's sweet enuff..

CNY is finally over. i didn't get to eat my favourite pink and white tang yuan...):
why? i thought every year must eat one.. must be recession. even tang yuan also cant afford to buy. haiz.. financial burden sucks. i cant wait to have my own financial freedom..i must work hard.

oh ya..btw..i finally got my own board.. its second hand. but im not complaining..

got it at a steal! 400 bucks with setup. thanks ken for helping me with the down-payment of the board.. this...meaning..adding more burden to myself financially.. but its time i got a board.i really wanna wakeboard..but im just not able to afford it.sighs..if not i will already be doing competitive this year..its okays...i will take my time... next year.. no gold no go home.!

finally completed part 1 of my WIL assignment..freaking 40%..damn alot.. next one 60%..good luck mans...

im sick..):

2009-02-08T11:21:00.002+08:00

i see dust on my blog.
been damn super busy..
assignments are getting on my edge pushing me to extremes.,
that ive to skip dance ytd. damn emo...stupid assignment.
SKIP DANCE!! the thought of it make my heart cringe.

at least ive 2 buddies of mine, johnny and ken, to fight that dumb assignment.
i realise ken has a talent for drawing..ahahaha..and johnny is finally on a diet.
and me?
-still the same old me: eating, snacking and growing fat every moment. and always full of nonsenses to irritate ppl.hees..

unexpected calls n msgs from a buddy of mine.had short chats.
i felt guilty. i realised the reasons y i don't really have much frens is that i dun really know to do the follow-ups and maintaining frens. seriously i sucks at it. forgive me frens!

im going to make a day in my every month a frens day and just keep everything away from that day to make space for my frens.

2009-01-30T13:15:00.000+08:00

A poem for ladies..

I shave my legs,
I sit down to pee.
And I can justify
any shopping spree.
Don't go to a barber,
but a beauty salon.
I can get a massage
without a hard-on.

I can balance the checkbook,
I can pump my own gas.
Can talk to my friends,
about the size of my ass.

My beauty's a masterpiece,
and yes, it takes long.
At least I can admit,
to others when I'm wrong.

I don't drive in circles,
at any cost.
And I don't have a problem,
admitting I'm lost.

I never forget,
an important date.
You just gotta deal with it,
I'm usually late.

I don't watch movies,
with lots of gore.
Don't need instant replay,
to remember the score.

I won't lose my hair,
I don't get jock itch.
And just cause I'm assertive,
Don't call me a bitch.

Don't say to your friends,
Oh yeah, I can get her.
In your dreams, my dear,
I can do better!

Flowers are okay,
But jewelry's best.
Look at me you idiot...
Not at my chest????

I don't have a problem,
With Expressing my feelings.
I know when you're lying,
You look at the ceiling.

call me a GIRL ,
a BABE or a CHICK .
I am a WOMAN.

Get it?, you DIC*!?!

interesting poem i saw online.

2009-01-21T14:48:00.002+08:00

15 JAN 2009. the day i passed my Car TP!!!
woots! although its 18 points. but still..i passed.! yays. i spent $800 plus only too..thank god. saved me many money.

when back to wakeboard on monday. wasn't that bad. at least i didnt fall too badly after being out of touch of wakeboard for so long...theey made johnny the president. hahaahaha! Cool. when johnny told me i thought it was a joke. they might make ken the vice-president..which i had doubts..but after much thinking..i think it not such a bad idea after all..

danceworks coming...gotta start training soon. competition..my very first dance competition. feel excited yet worried that i may not be up to it.my back is still not very good for dancing yet..there is still kinda movement restrictions.

the Eve's open class that i attended at O school. i kinda like it.

2009-01-10T00:00:00.002+08:00

Welcome to RMIT elina!
cya ard in school soon..

talking about school.ive been freaking tired ever since school started. not much rest at all..lectures, dance, car pracs... like so tired after every end of the day. and wake up so early every morning. i almost spend half the lecture time nodding at the lecturer. luckily i was sitting in the front roll pretending to be studious, thus, avoiding being caught by the lecturers..
guess what? THE very FIRST day of school, got assignment to do already..the feeling sucks. like so fast the bomb have been thrown to you waiting to explode on you anytime now. and its not an easy assignment to start with. gawd. the worst is...im having muscle aches all over from practising for the "test" ryan gonna give us on sat. which, is tml also. how to do the moves well with all the muscle aches. i can hardly move. every move i that take is torturing..i feel stiff. like robot. tml is also my first Hip Hop II class..double the dance every sat makes me dunno whether to laugh or cry..laugh cos im happy i can dance. cry cos so tiring.........which means i will under lotsa stress trying to catch up with the rest. starting with not much or almost NO dance background..everything is like alien and new to me. for starters, im still learning how to move my body properly. that is how bad i am.

DANGS. its past 12. gotta slp soon. if not tml die again for me.
tata. .

2009-01-06T01:05:00.002+08:00

when down to ryders to celebrate william's and amanda's bday.
gave them a surprise. william got a shock and amanda was sooo happy..haha..
ate seafood again..chilli crabs, black pepper crabs and many more..was so full until i couldn't move.
time to eat lesser alr.. these few days keep on got cravings to eat eat and eat...
size also growing bigger n bigger..honey going to scold me soon. hai.
why does guys like skinny and slim girls with good figures? always make girls so stressed.
i would like my guy to be tall, lean and FIT too.
im so tired.
next time~~

2009-01-05T00:34:00.004+08:00

Tadadaaa! my new shoes!

finally found it after much time..so having patience is truly a great thing after all.

Soooo pretty right? i can't help but take a few pictures of it...

i must thank cheryl for helping me pay for the shoes first. cos im too broke. well..if not for her..i think my shoes would be gone by the time i had the money to buy it. cheryl bought one for herself too! same design but different size. yay! finally ive a proper shoe to wear for dance. it cost me $159. but i think it's worth it..hehe.

M-I-C-K-E-Y M-O-U-S-E
mickey mouse!
hahahahaa..i caught this mickey mouse on the 20th of dec 08. was supposed to celebrate wif honey my bday. and he supposed to catch for me..but somehow i was the one who caught it. haha..but thanks honey for the cute mickey mouse. my bday present! hohoho. he bought for me 2 clothes as well..woowooo...honey also went with me to sin ming ave for fish spa for my legs..
Everyone pls DO NOT GO there..the fishes are vicious! my leg the skin now like one patch one patch one.and its my skin felt painful n raw afterwards...the photo wif honey..so i cant upload.beware those wif sensitive skins esp.

We finally decided to take neoprint.
LOL.. im glad we both HATE to take pictures. so this is like quite Rare indeed.

i sent out quite a number of xmas cards to my frens..wonder if they received them..

went st james last night to celebrate weile's bday.

so many drunk ppl.

luckily i didnt drink.

i had bad sore throat and wasnt feeling well.

blessings in disguise.

met cheryl, ken and po to dance instead. po is so sexy..cheryl is soo hip hop..haha..im jealous.im neither. hope i can find my own style soon.

2008-12-31T00:14:00.002+08:00

dreamwerkz xmas party cum 4th bday celebration.

thanks jernice for hosting us. im sure we had fun. thanks jernice mom for covering blankets for us and her bro for buying breakfast for us the next morning.

and of cos....thanks for the memories of *ahem* which all present promised to keep to ourselves and let it stay only in our memories but not in pictures.

xmas is finally over.

this year xmas is like.......so not enjoyable.

and my holidays..are like crap. worst holiday ever. never even play hard enough and school's gonna reopen again. so Not like me.i won't feel motivated to study if i never play hard enough for my holidays..too bad bf doesn't allow hardcore parties. im beginning to worry about studying mood when school reopen.. worry this and that. sometimes i wished i was still single..free n easy..

oh well.....thou shall not speak much......Zipppp..

This photo was taken at Hotel626.

OMG. i refused to off the freaking lights cos i was afraid of the dark. this game is damn challenging..not really scary. but if you anyhow think then it will become scary.
haha..my face is like "WTH is this about" and my timid sister was hiding behind me. of cause Ginger was the bravest as she took the frontline in front of me staring at the screen curiously.

too bad the cam wasn't low enough to capture her face. Wasted.

2008-12-15T01:37:00.003+08:00

Huge Pikachu and me!(:

Me trying to be a fierce samurai in Japanese shop called Muji.

honey and me at the pet farm with a cute few months old bunny. *cute*

Sorry for MIA-ing again.

been real busy with the dance practices and wakeboarding..

Not forgetting to party hard too. Went for ZoukOut yesterday! (:

its my holis. and school's is starting in 3 weeks time.

my gawd..thats like fast.

thursday is the actual performance at Zouk already. and ryan just taught us new steps on saturday. so scary! wish means have to practice extra hard to try and minimise any mistakes made. and im still not sexy enough. the worse is i hurt my back, which is just making things worse. i hope all is well soon. my back really hurts.

wakeboarding recreational is on 19th dec friday.im afraid i cant ride for time being. hurt my back and the next day which is 20th dec saturday, ive another dance performance at hereen.

Busy Busy Busy.

And the following day which is 21th dec sunday is the dreaded day, my birthday.

and coincidentally, dance team xmas party will be on the day too. "JUST GREAT" T.T

2008-12-02T20:34:00.005+08:00

Ken(aka Keno) and his band (Ridge) would be competing in the Yamaha Asian Beats Competition
DO COME DOWN TO SUPPORT Them at Plaza Singapura this SAT(6th DEC) at 7PM!!!

OH! Dont forget to check them out too.(:
uber good.

<<RIDGE>>

im seriously rottin at home. damn this feeling.

2008-12-01T13:50:00.002+08:00

finally the competition ended.
sorry for the disappointment.
my opponent was no kick no me at all. but yet i nvr give it my all.
the only injury i had was my nose being elbowed by my honey. sucks right. tads how powerful an elbow can be. imagined a trained elbow.. nose sure break one.
sorry uncle terence. i saw the look in ur eyes. at least i manage to take it back in the last round.
wad was i thinking in the first 2 rounds man.
anyways its over.

stuck at honey's house.
trying to do sth useful by coming online.
my stupid tummy ache from ytd until now still pain. on and off. wanna kill me.

2008-11-29T00:41:00.003+08:00

mood now is like:

dunno why. but very ..
what the hell is wrong with me?

oh well. when pet farm today with frances, cm, nic & boon.
was fun. saw goats, geese, dogs, hamsters, bunnies, lizards, guinea pigs, emu, unknown birds, fishes. I shall award cm the "farmer boy" award. he seems to be attracting the animals and attracted by the animals. he was still catching small fishes with mini nets even though the rest gave up long ago. the bunnies were so fluffy soft and hamsters so chubby. the dogs to me, of course, were all so adorable. i love every single dog there, yeaps, even the fiercest or largest one.
animals make me damn happy !

they can never fail to cheer me up. seriously.

had a fun day at the pet resort. thanks nic for everything.

after that went to amk hub to walk walk. i went to the arcade and caught 2 mini soft toys with 3 bucks. damn cute. one is the dog the another is a sheep. i gave the sheep to honey. they were of halloween series. damn adorable.

not goin dance tml.

2008-11-28T03:44:00.001+08:00

Cute?

Courtesy from my drummer friend, Ken.
he drew it for my on msn. (:

hm..revamped my blog a bit.
hope u guys like it.

do you?

2008-11-27T02:55:00.003+08:00

-Advertorial-
Looking for a JOB?
Visit Us @ SGjobfinder.blogspot.com NOW!

wow. they do have some nice job offers.

2008-11-27T01:27:00.003+08:00

quoted from somewhere:
"if a person gets her heart hurt too often, she will eventually walk away"
will i?

the fight is this sunday. im not sure if im really prepared for it.
seriously. but i've gotta put up a brave front in order to encourage the rest. god knows how freaking scared i am inside. furthermore, honey wont be there on that day..what if i am freaking sscared. got no one to hug.): but honey not there also good. he wont get to see me get beaten up.
pros and cons. one is for my own good cause, the other will be for honey. of course i would take the lather. i musst learn to be independent and strong.just in case.

i seriously ALWAYS wonder y ppl like to seek for trouble when they can stay outta it.
everytime go haunted places..not that im scared or what. im just too..tooo..sick of it.? just dun wanna go seek for it or wad.wanna just leave it. oh well, dun wanna spoil their "fun".. weirdos leh..at least if im ard, i can be of some help? maybe distractions? so the rest can run for it?
seriously one day when they really meet it. they will regret.

2008-11-24T15:33:00.002+08:00

Dance!
im a superhero too.
ryan said we had a 4 split sec chance of being a superhero.
move that superhero muscles and hit it!
hit it hard. and burst out right.
oh gawd. how i love to dance. i wonder why i have passion for so many things. what the hell is wrong with me. ppl normally have one only. but ive many. i just love the things i do.and the things i wanna do.

i wanna thank my mom.
she was the one who had me motivated to dance. if my mom can dance. so can i.
i think i'm pretty much like my mom. she used to play volleyball when she was young too.. i didnt know until i played volleyball for some time. she leak out the secret to me. im so proud to be like my mom.

is like you have one shot to do things that u like and want in this life. just get down on it and BAMM...give it a time of your life. life's like a show/movie/performance. show others what u are capable of. and what u are. gotta give it ur best shot. makes those ard u smile and say "yeah man! thats the girl. she's she. she's a star of her life." before your show ends.

dance that dance. ride that waves. fight that fight. ride that wind. love with love.

2008-11-24T05:40:00.000+08:00

what a long night..or rather morning..i need my beauty sleep...........

2008-11-22T02:22:00.002+08:00

no emo posts here.
cos they dun belong here.
this blog shall only contain my life. and more happy monents.

i will dump them somewhere else.

When Cancer and Sagittarius make a love match, they both need to be patient and give the relationship time to grow and mature. As it develops, each love partner will discover that they have much to offer one another. At first, it just seems like Sagittarius is the thrill seeker who enjoys the occasional adrenaline rush, and that Cancer derives much more satisfaction from emotional security. Early in the relationship, Cancer may want more of a commitment than Sagittarius is willing to give. But as time goes by, Sagittarius will learn to appreciate the strong emotional support that Cancer offers.

These two lovers, Cancer and Sagittarius, have different approaches to life; Cancer lives on emotion and tradition, and Sagittarius is the restless wanderer. Cancer's emotional tidal wave can be difficult and overwhelming for Sagittarius to accept. And Cancer might be resistant to accepting their Sagittarian mate's restlessness and craving for external activities. A Cancer partner can offer a Sagittarius a secure home base, a place where Sag can go to keep their dreams and ambitions in perspective. The Sagittarius free spirit can lend Cancer's daily life a little diversity and excitement.

The Moon (Emotion) rules Cancer, and Jupiter (Philosophy) rules Sagittarius. The Moon is about love, nurturing and the maternal instinct. Jupiter focuses on expansion, optimism, luck and travel. Together this is combination of growth and expansion and of masculine and feminine energy; the two can sustain each other. When working toward a common goal, these two can combine their energies to great effect.

Cancer is a Water Sign, and Sagittarius is a Fire Sign. Sagittarius desires freedom, while Cancer longs for emotional security and stability, and these basic needs color their approach to life, to projects and to relationships. One lover may not always get where the other lover is coming from, but when they put their complementary energies together, sparks can fly and dreams can come true. If they value their intimate connection and their friendship and respect one another's opinions, their conflicts can usually be resolved.

Cancer is a Cardinal Sign, and Sagittarius is a Mutable Sign. Sagittarius moves from idea to idea and venture to venture as the feeling takes them, while Cancer is the instigator of new plans. A Cancer mate must give their Sagittarius lover the freedom to explore their own space and interests external to the relationship. Cancer can bring Sagittarius' great ideas to life, even if Sagittarius has lost interest and moved on. Sagittarius teaches Cancer the virtues of an open mind over constant and inflexible determination.

What's the best part of the Cancer-Sagittarius love match? The security they can give one another (once Cancer gives Sagittarius the freedom to offer that security freely). They make a compatible couple once they open themselves up to one another and accept as valid each other's differing life philosophies. If the lines of communication remain open and clear, and as long as these two take time to appreciate and celebrate their differences, theirs will be a stable and happy relationship.

2008-11-22T01:27:00.004+08:00

that curve at the corners where are you. .
i dunno. why does it always seems so near yet so far.
the bright light shining seems to be dimming.

YAY. damn happy. met ken n cindy today. Happy happy. i damn happy.
went eat at far east den went to bugis. spent money.
gf asked me..why u like just wanna spend money even when u know u have nth to buy?
reason is i hate money. Fucking money. trying to make me a slave. dream on. im ur master. i dun like u. u better be gone. make my honey ur slave. make him stress. i hate u.

honey i love u.

will u wait for me

2008-11-21T02:56:00.002+08:00

dance kickbox wakeboard.
thats my life now.

and i can't #@*^&?! do a simple sexy catwalk.
im such a failure for being a girl.
kickboxing competition next week.
dance performance next month.
wakeboarding competition next year.
gawd.
busy. sch starting again next month. sucks man.
when baby's having holis im schooling again. not fair. so hard to go on holis tgt.
when are we going to go on holis tgt?? )):
pizza? jap food? steamboat? sunblock? polariod camera? sp?
am i asking for too much? it think i am..
i dun want anything except my baby.

having honey's enough.

okay im starving now. AGAIN.
its feeding time but i cant feed myself.

2008-11-15T00:26:00.004+08:00

OMG! Ginger's like the cutest dog on earth.

she had a feather stuck in her nose yet she still can lie down there and relax.not caring a bit about it. damnn adorable.

its been 4 days since the end of war..

kinda miss my war zone with those japanese sweets always in reach.

i did my nails!! ice cream..candy...cupcake..star!

yum yum..
oh..btw..this photo is damn funny... i happened to toss the food towards honey and it landed there. WORST of all. it looks DAMN damn WRONG!! HAhahahaha..ROFL!
Went to collect my Clarins beauty product today with honey. tad sweets got it for me. haha. it rained..and i had really bad tummy cramps that i almost didnt wanna go out. but honey skipped sch for me. i dun wanna bcos of cramps and not go out wif him. he cooked eggs for me in da morning..it wasn't the one i missed....but it was alright.edible i guess..ate blueberry bread as well..anyways, i took panadol to feel better. but didnt feel better until i got to town. so imagine the pain i had from home in mrt and all the way to town. hurts like mad i didnt even wanna talk.i just slept in the train. honey offered his shoulders and fingers for me to grab.
suprisingly, either the panadol took effect or was it the aura of shopping and food. when i reach town pain was gone. collected my clarins from paragon and we went to taka to eat.ate thai food.yummy~~

bought cookieman's cookie for my honey so he wouldn't go hungry while doing project later on and he bought peppermint brownie for me! (: it was good.the brownie wasnt dry. but i couldnt finish it. so saved some for my sister to try. she's working at a road show promoting wine.

after honey went to find his fren do project i went shopping alone....weee....wasnt tad bad. at least i can take my time slowly choose no need to worry about others waiting too long..
i took like almost 1 1/2 hours to choose my lingerie. cos different cutting had different sizes and fittings.

TA-DA! i love the colours! sooo nice la.

i also bought a color pencil which have many many colours in one. and its black in colour. looks cool. yet colourful!
((: happiness. i dig colours!

u dun have to be rich to be able to shop and be happy.

all u need to do is jusst appreciate things ard u.

exams are finally over

2008-11-11T01:38:00.004+08:00

brain damaged severely.
i feel emo upset and my head hurts even after the exams.
too much studying too much damage done.
escaped to swiss hotel.to find my uncle.

the view is magnificant.

mom and i went to the swimming pool. this is the baby pool..surprisingly Big.this is the adult pool. nice and sweet. the whole place smelled like lemongrass-so refreshing and yet relaxing..i love it.me lying down and relaxing by the pool.yes..i really wore the bathrobe from the 58 storey to the swimming pool and back.im back in the hotel room to shower and faster prepare to go for dinner.ahhhhhh.....bathtub! my fav~this is for my honey..

honey i really miss u many many....));

i wanna be your bed bug and haunt u even when u sleep.

i will be your panda and koala.

and whatever u want me to be.

2008-11-04T13:29:00.002+08:00

isnt my sweetie pie chihuahua cute? with ur Big bone in front of her.hehe, love her lots.

this is a picture taken at night safari..yes. creepy? my camera gt the "creepy" effect. cos its not clear enuff.haha. btw. tad ghost is my sec sch fren benedict. he happened to be working there as "ghosts" along wif jasper and Zhu zheng.. Long time no see. the other 2 were badly make-up tad i cldnt recognise them. i think jasper was a tree soul while zhu zheng was the clown.referencing from benedict.

really had fun tad day getting myself scared. i think its more of shocking than scary. cos got one i alr saw the mummy,, but it tot it was fake. so i relaxed..den it ran out and scared me.. i screamed until i almost fell off my seat. luckily matamis was beside me. lol..on the way home tad day..matamis's sis found a roach in my dad's car..tsktsktsk..time to do some cleaning..

this is my battle ground at home. table filled with food n drinks. more imptly FOOD. haha..was studyin fr PM. next paper is HMT AND MKT(my major) the 2 mot diff paper. gd luck man.

THis is one of my fav snacks..JAPANESE SWEETS..i dunnoy but i jusst simply love jap food.

Anyone willingly to provide me with jap food everyday..i will melt.

Jap food got zero resistence level in me.

2008-10-28T17:53:00.002+08:00

im back from msia. my paper is on wednesday. yet i went on holi. came back ytd. giving me just 1 day to prepare for my paper tml. im like insane.
anyways. was looking tru friendster...came across my "ah beng" ex-bf profile. i was like OMG..he slimmed down so much and he is like so FIT la...the NS is serving its purpose. haha..and he like dun smoke reds anymore..which is very gd. better to smoke lighter.and he also got himself a pretty gf and tgt for 1 yr plus too.. feel happy for him.hehe..hope me and honeybunchs can do so too.. have a little faith. (;

sister..i nvr meet see u in channel 69 leh..u must be change channel to cartoon networks..go find Betty's Boobs right..hahaha...joking..u arh..dun keep on fetching other girls and make betty jealous. later one day she get paranoid then u know.sister loves long time..

IM SOOOOOO DEAD. TML'S MY PAPER....ARGH.............

2008-10-22T15:21:00.002+08:00

First of all. i wanna complain. i received a letter from Mr. Kenny R. and he played a joke on me.

he tore up the letter he mailed me and said it was a jizsaw puzzle. i was stunned when i saw it.. both sides are filled with words.. i took half an hour to solve it. my IQ damn low can.. i almost cried for joy when i completed it and painstakingly taped it together...
DONT do it again k? if not my face will be so stressed like the one below:
TADA! after much effort. hehee..proud of myself..
anyways, damn happy when my mom told me ive mail...cos I"VE GOT MAIL!!!

the joy of receiving a letter from a far far away land. and the long awaited Snail mail finally arrived. will reply soon when ive got time.. exams in 2 days.....):

THE MUGGING SESSION AT FARRER ROAD MACS:
Lucky johnny had a BANANA Snack made by a special someone to motivate him in his mouth.

NOT FAIR! he looked so blissful..where's mine huh???!!! i also want.*jealous*

THIS IS MY MONSTER'S BLUE M&Ms STAINED TEETH...Eeeee......mauhahaha..blackmail u.

2008-10-18T00:35:00.002+08:00

so upset.. why am i like this?
teach me to control.
why cant i be happy like before. please take my hands and lead me out of the shadows..
i dont wanna live my life like this anymore. no more tears, no more frustrations, no more hurting.. help me.
im very tired.. so tired. how long can i hang on?
how long will you let me hang on. dont let me sink in. again..

2008-10-15T16:44:00.002+08:00

9 more days left to my papers...im screwed........
no motivation to study lehhhhhhhhhhhhhhh......
ytd was my sister's bday. my dog was bring greedy again. will upload pics soon..

2008-10-11T09:29:00.000+08:00

im so tired.
very tired and a "TaXing" day..
i gonna catch some rest. laters~~

2008-10-09T16:35:00.003+08:00

today i ken's 21st bday. goin to celebrate with him at Dome later. goin to see my gf again. yays. i miss her.i ate supper last night! omg. minced pork noodles..and macs new wasabi fries. the minced pork noodles was nice. the waabi fries was okay only. i still prefer the seaweed shakers. they are like da best!

Btw, ALERT EVERYONE!! PLS DO NOT EAT THE CURRY SAUCE FROM MAC DONALDS. they are most probably contaminated... not long ago. got pple found maggots in it. AND ytd i unconsciously asked for curry sauce. and when i opened it. omg..it looks wrong. there was some black things in it and some dried up disgusting look thing was formed on the top layer. damned sick. luckily i looked before i dipped. Looks like the alert given to me was not fake after all.

this was an alert sent to me a week ago:

"I went to the outlet at Compasspoint on 3 Sep 08 at about 10pm. I ordered 2 Double Cheeseburger and a 9 Pcs Chicken Nuggets. After which I asked for Curry Sauce and Chilli Sauce to take away. When i got home, which was a short 2 mins ride, TO MY HORROR, when i opened the packet of curry sauce, i was greeted with a 'smell' and there were many tiny maggots crawling inside with a portion of the curry sauce which have turned black and harden and possibly rotting.

I wrote in to feedback to Macdonalds the same night, and this morning (4 Sep) i had a call from a Business Manager apologising for this encounter, the first thing she asked was if i had kept the packet of curry sauce! The maggots were crawling out, obviously i had it disposed as soon as i took the photos, and in our conversation she also mentioned that this is not isolated to the outlet at Compasspoint! It was island wide as it could be a supplier problem.

I think it is ridiculous! She also told me there were a few complaints already. Shouldn't they stop giving out curry sauce while pending investigation? It was 'fortunate' for me that the rotting and maggots were visible. For those packets which have not turned black may have maggots swimming in the sauce which is not known to the consumer. I asked her if they do check the expiry date of the sauces, she mentioned that the turnover for curry sauce is very high thus unlikely it would hit past the expiry date.

Then my question is, if it is not even past its expiry date and it is rotting with maggots, what's going on??? This just serves as a warning to fellow Macdonalds consumers to watch out before dipping your food into curry sauce, you may not know what is swimming and growing in there..."

it look damn gross!!! what i saw in my curry sauce was somewhat SIMILAR!! arrrhhhhh......

im so disappointed in macs.

2008-10-06T16:38:00.002+08:00

Small Pudding.

yupps..thats right. this is the hamster i adopted from cheryl. poor thing. it was so close to being thrown out of the window. this little thing is one sleepy head. sleep and sleep and sleep all day long. it yawns all the time too.

ive been pigging again. why am i not surprised. ate big bowl of seaweed cold dish. had chicken vege soup. fruits. M&Ms. vitagen. and now im already thinking of dinner. i feel so hungry..... i can NEVER lose weight. bleh~~

only finish studying 3 chapters of MR. 12 more to go. so damn tedious la. thats only more 1 module. ive got 3 more modules to go..good luck to me.

went to eat KFC as planned ytd...i really enjoy eating all kinds of Fattening food. at first didnt wanna go when i tot of the Fats..but temptation caved in. i still ate it. honey went to cut hair after that. it was only freaking $3.80/cut.

Damn cheap.
but the hairdresser that did honey's hair didnt cut what honey wanted. but i tot i was nice still. he didnt agree at all..mayb it didnt hit what he had in mind.

so went home and i helped honey trimmed his hair. im glad he felt better after that. hopefully i didnt do a bad job.

i am irritated by honey's "L-O-L" whenever i talked on the phone with him..i felt as though i was chatting on MSN..wonder where he learnt that from. damn irritating. next time im goin to "H-A-H-A" him back..

*evils*

2008-10-05T05:21:00.004+08:00

what the hell am i doin up so late?
studying, duh...Sick child lah! why cant i study in the morning and afternoon?!
i seriously think i am a vampire in my previous life.
and the worse is.. by the time its night. i am already so tired.how to study much.sigh.and the "worsetest" worse is..there is sooooooooo damn much to study.like never ending.
i am getting more and more tannnneed!! this no good...i dun like the sun.
i just got burnt ytd. now my face is brown with a tinge of maroon. luckily i put mosturiser in time. now a bit better. btw.. i spolit my sister's hole-puncher she lent me. faster destroy evidence before she comes back from msia...i was damn sadded it spoilt..after i spent 1/2 hr trying salvage it. -.-

i went for my first advance dance lessons today..ryan taught. i missssssss DANIEL!! daniel's like so cute la..miss his every move and the way he teaches.hes damn patient too. like so funny yet serious. ryan is cool..however more fierce and serious. but ryan can push us to improve better. so pros and cons. i guess every instructor got their own style. but i still think daniel's cute. hhahaha..all the girls in class agreed too. the dance moves and pace for advance is soo much more difficult and faster.. slowpoke like me was like almost CMI..i guess i need more more practice given that i have no dance backgrd and moves dun come naturally for me. the physical was quite fierce too.. 100 plus push ups...my arms cld just give way anytime..now my body like robot..all stiff and achey..work hard girl..i may get a chance to perform for dancezation(or wadever its spelt la).

i adopted a hamster again. its dunno what pudding breed..sounds tasty. but its white-grey in color. upload its pic when i have the time..its sooo adorable. first time i saw hamster stretched and yawned so big.. the mouth really opened Damn big that i thought i cld see its throat.

kk.......now....back...........to.............boring.................................notes........
))))))))))))):

btw. i finally ate hor fun today after craving for it for so long.
heh heh.. next is the tastiest and sweetest and most finger-licking delicious kfc chickens..cos honey goin to eat with me.heeeeeeeeeees! =D
im a lucky girl.

2008-09-28T14:01:00.002+08:00

had advance dance team audition yesterday.
i think i totally screwed up my freestyle part. oh well, its okay. dancing takes practices, no one knows how to dance overnight. when ryan said: listen to the beat and dance. i was like Shit..im gone big time. im practically almost beat-deaf. cant hear, how to follow and dance? at least i didnt screw up the cheorograph part. *pats on my own back*
went to play beach volley after that. at the end of the day i was so drained that i almost wanna faint. didnt have time to eat at all except for breakfast. ate wanton mee at vivo there..and i was damn dehydrated too. drank like 3 big cups of sugarcane, chingteng and lemonade respectively after that. was so shagged that i KO-ed at home after that.

i can get through this period.
i can. i just need to suppress my emotions.
be gone depression. i will not break down.
thank you my sweet crayon monster..thanks for being there for me and with me every moment.
thanks for the talks, the walks, the tissues, for lending me ur shoulders to cry on, the time spent...and more..really appreciate everything you've done for me.
i wanna be childish and say sth. "lub lub yew..."
hehe.

2008-09-16T22:43:00.001+08:00

Miss Chang.
All you do is cry cry cry..
WAke up your idea la!
What's WRONG with you?! SERIOUSLY.
PMS Bitch.

2008-08-26T17:12:00.003+08:00

i finally passed my btt. got my PDL done too. can start driving already. the thought of it makes me estatic. but no money go for driving also..
today is tuesday. could have gone wakeboarding.. end up stuck at dear dear house. doin nothing somemore. not that i fancy having a lot of things to do.but the thought of wasting my life away doing nothing meaningful and sleeping makes me hate wasting time. time is precious. maybe not many may be able to understand this but with time, i can actually do a lot of things. not with money. if u have the money yet no time. its still meaningless. at least if u have time, u still can make money out of it. yes, money can buy More time. but time once gone cant be bought back. its like the past. at least money when gone still can be earned back..wasting time away cant earn u money.that's why lazy people ain't no rich man.

dear dear still sleeping. what am i supposed to do? . took time out to spend time with him tot can go out or do sth or wad..in the end watch him sleep..sleepy head. at least we cooked instant noodle for lunch tgt.n he accompanied me to bbdc. appreciated..
..hm..the day goin end with me goin home and he goin to meet his frens as usual.
z.

i want the hello kitty phone...):
dear dear said will help me find............................but.............
i dont think so.
am i wasting money?

2008-08-23T16:30:00.002+08:00

i wish i had the Hello Kitty handphone. ): ): ):

FAILED again. damn it.
hello? just because i dont want to bring you home and refuse to tell u the brand of my perfume.
and just because im short and cant hold my bike strongly.
this is crap.

2008-08-21T00:56:00.003+08:00

life is like a cigg.
its a bitch.fucker.
breathe in fresh air and tell urself that the world is such a nice place.
then, go back to room and try to kill myself.

slogging my ass off...yet i cant spend my money. holiday or no holiday. bike or no bike. phone or no phone.Bitch.
people in singapore are really such slaves. study like a bitch.work like a bitch.complain like a bitch.yet get treated like a bitch.y cant the higher ppl be nicer to us and relax our systems.how can we even have babies in such a stressful environment.no wonder the birth rate is dropping..like what boon said.celebrating national day every year to celebrate the survival of the people being able to survive such torture thrown to us. kids nowadays are so pampered. the things they study like so simple. everything spoon fed to them. i think they forgot what is creative thinking and something called using their own brains to find out the answers. dunno only ask or give up..nvr even try.somewhat quite hopeless. i hope the minority doesnt represents the majority. if not our next generation society will all be controlled by artificial intelligence. "owning. fresh blood..killing spree. god-like..."

somehow wished people weren't so cruel to each other.
why cant they let bygones be bygones.

2008-08-13T22:07:00.002+08:00

its been a long time.
life has been urber busy. really..justed conquered my econs test today.
been mugging the whole day for it. hah..den dear dear came down with friend and wanted to fetch me work..but daddy alr fetching me. but he so sweet. passed cookie to my daddy to pass to me.my daddy laughed lo..he said dear dear so funny. haha.when for tuition.finally got my pay. happy happy! although tuition was cancelled again(._.)

i 've got 2000 word assignment to do!! jia you jia you.
took this after my dance. can see my face very tired and dear dear stressed out from studies. but we still managed to smile.cos we've got each other.

2008-07-27T18:13:00.003+08:00

its sunday. went to give tuition in the morning and then went home.
bought sushi for lunch. so shiok. how i wish i can eat sushi everyday. im totally a sushi-jap stuff addict. i just love japanese things, culture, etc..

so bored. dear is studying whilst im slacking my ass off at home. oh man, feeling guilty but i just cant bring myself to study on a sunday. been slacking for 3 days straight already. this cant do. procrastination is not good for me. better at least study a bit later. PM test coming up in 1 week time!!! GOSH. that's really fast. for a super slow learner like me, i better start early. and 2000 words assignment is running towards me with a knife. its due in 1 week time toooo.........ahhhhhhhh! horrible.

btw. i soooo soooooooooo in love with this hello kitty hp. although im a person who will join the "hate-hello-kitty-fan-club", this hp is too cute for me to resist. its a touch screen, and when u on it, there will be this cutesy hello kitty melody. how to describe this hp? erm.. 100% girly(hair standing), cute to the core(everything is pink and kitty), childish to certain extent depending on how u view it(the melody so kiddish), it damn small and light. functions are so-so but its worth its packaging.

HELLO KITTY TOUCH SCREEN HANDPHONE

dual-band (900/1800Mhz)

GSM phone

2 inch touchscreen

1.3 megapixel camera

microSD slot

LED lights

49 x 92.5 x 14.8 mm(thats how small it is!)

imported from TAIWAN/CHINA

i seriously think im going to get one of this when i have extra money leftover next month. they have other designs in cinnamon roll design as well..haha if ive the bucks. i will get one for kenny. hes a cinnamon roll addict.lol.den i told dear i wanted hello kitty hp, he asked me got dear daniel design one a not. hahahahaha..he so cute la. cant imagine him using "dear daniel" hp. too bad.. dun have.

oh ya.. i tried using my no 1 facial cleanser on my dear's face. his face really also become better.n means its EFFECTIVE!.. girls out there i advice its a must use to have good complexion..

P.S. i feel sick from eating too much cold ham.....belch!..wanna vomit already.

2008-07-25T08:43:00.002+08:00

yesterday was my first lesson of hip hop dance, daniel from o-sch taught us. it was tiring, we did lots of exercises. running, hopping, crunches, push-ups , burpes, etc.. muscles aching now. haha. anyway, we danced almost 2 hours straight, excluding the warm ups. so fun. although i couldnt get most of the moves right(due to lack of talent and more of practice actually) , i enjoyed myself thoroughly. sweated like waterfall. most importantly, i found daniel cute! he's so charismatic. the way he moves and talks. the way he mentioned "pao pao cha"(bubble tea)..and his fizzy weed-like hair. AHhh..CUTE! totally.

im done with my part for my marketing project. 1 stress load down. more to go..jia you! wakeboardin next monday again. excited! i think dancing, wakeboarding and dear are the one keeping me SANE. all the stress loads..over whelming.

2008-07-24T11:44:00.005+08:00

My no.1 Gentle Daily Cleanser

Key Ingredients: Saponaria, Yucca, Echinacea & centella asiatica, Clary Sage
(a unique formulation of natural pure-plant extracts!)

recently ive been using this new facial cleanser.
which i think is exceptionally good.
this facial cleanser doesnt dry out my skin like the others do after washing.
ive been having lots of pimples lately and after using this facial cleanser, my pimples have significantly been reduced.

What i like Most about this facial cleanser is that after washing, ur skin will instantly feel very soft, moisturised and SMOOTH..and it doesnt irritate my eyes at all as it is soap-free. Very good for those with delicate or sensitive skin.

I think im going to make this my number 1 facial cleanser! Hehe.. Good complexion, here i come.(:

2008-07-24T10:44:00.003+08:00

my prince charming has abandoned his stallion.
sadded. but no choice. its for his own good.
at least now he have lesser things to worry about..but what is a prince without his stallion?
a walking prince.
lol..not bad. at least can become fitter.

school's a killer. been rushing this and that. assignment dasdline brought forward again. darn it!.

today's my first lesson of hip hop in school. wish me good luck.
i cant dance for nuts.

2008-07-23T16:24:00.006+08:00

although im a malaysian chinese thai.
i dun speak nor understand thai.
but im still chinese.
YES. i do listen to chinese songs too..im not potatoe.

Another long day for me.
woke up so early in the morning to reach school at 8 plus.
so early again.Finally im not late for sch! yays!
sat outside the lecture threatre and took out my PM notes to browse..
then i saw johnny.. my classmate. he was so nice. i asked him to teach me topic 1 cos i missed out on it and he agreed willingly. however i realised i dun have that topic as well. damn it. i paid fr the notes yet so many chapter dun hab. in the end.. walked to lib to photocopy...csah card no money. when to atm to top up.
GUESS WHAT?! i only found out totday that atm can actually top up cash card. WOW. i've been a mountain turtle all this while. Shameful..
anyways. went to canteen grabbed some fruits to eat.. after that i suddenly had cravings for ice cream. thus decided to walk over to mega bites and ordered a blueberry icecream... and everyone was like asking why eatin ice cream on such a cold and rainy day? my reason was. cos i felt like it. Bleah. sometimes you dont have to have a reason for everything u do..
headed towards lecture threatre and from there the torture started.
i was like dozing off like every minute. sooooooooooo damn tired! the worse is.. after the great torture..wAS another mini torture..marketing group meeting. i packed wanton mee to the bench and sat and ate while discussing the project. after all.. here i am.. back at home.

my dear finally got a prepaid card. now no need to worry about how to contact him already. poor boy. his line got cut by service provider due to over-whelming amount of phone bills. can understand..his phone is always ringing all the time.. busy guy.

I wish i was slimmer and pretty.
Isn't this almost every girl's wish. secretly, even when they say no.

2008-07-14T00:11:00.000+08:00

2008-07-13T23:59:00.003+08:00

he skipped lunch and dinner break just to save money to meet her for dinner after work.and he gave her a caramel lollipop to cheer her up.(:
never complained about her being fat and that peck on her forehead to make her days and nights. The warm and tight hugs just made her feel secure and safe from the chaotic world out there. taking care of her ever so closely never letting her feel more pain than she should be feeling. never once complain troublesome about travelling the distances and the rising petrol prices. coming down just to see her do her own things and the word "boring" never came across him when he does so. so much more that he've done for her that can never be said finish.
sweetest person she ever met.
thanks so much!
honey i love you and beyond.(;

2008-07-12T10:47:00.004+08:00

BBLEAHHH~~~~~~~~~~~~~~!

been a long long long long time.......

my damn internet was down like soooo long.

i though i will rot and die of lagging.

and become cave man..

anyways. school's started. been so busy too.

im glad to say.. i've damn cool and happening classmates. thank god.

they club. they hang out.

ytd johnny and chow ken even came down to find me at work.

they so cute la. although i cant hang out wif them after work, i promised them tuna sandwich made with love from me to them on monday. haha.

i miss sister,yuan,peggy,chengliang,many many more..... ahhhhhh.... cheng liang dun go NS!! i will miss u long time..

life is a bore..so tired everyday. i think im gonna break down soon too..so broke. ytd i dreamt that both my bank a/c no money..that is really a nightmare. anyone wanna donate money to me??

my dear pretty little cheryl......

2008-06-17T05:21:00.004+08:00

Night out at thumper's on 14-06-2008's early morning. contradicting. but u get what i meant.

bh and siangkee.a classic..failure photo taken. but somehow i captured sk's stunned face. it was soo darn funny.we were at Thumper. and siang was high. jx was drunk. xiong vomited like a merlion and my poor bh as drunk after 151. Dear Dont worry, i asked those AN to mend the floor already..no more holes now.LOL! Muahahaha. im famous for killing ppl wif 151, esp beginners.

my laptop lcd cracked thanks to mom.
went down to acer in hope of repairing it. but when i heard it costs 600++ bucks, my heart sank like titanic. called dad, and he asked me to repair elsewhere. oh man..so sad. 600++ bucks can go thailand already. met bh, wanted to go town for job interview. but we were too late, the office closed already. in the end we slacked at my house until 7 plus. what were we doing? SLACKING.. and serious, i tried to pack my room. and i found my old Lord of the Ring deck! i was reminiscing the past lively and bh sat there and laughed at me. but my deck really reminded me of the good old days. i miss my frens. i miss kenny, darren, shane...my lotr khakis..lol.wonder if we ever will have to chance to sit down again like the past and just spend the entire day playing. i realised as we grow up, everyone of us will change and go our separate ways. no matter how close we are, there is bound to be a distance. thus, we must treasure every moment we have now. no matter what happens between friends, good or bad, always start the next day afresh, forget the bad moments cos it a blessing to be even friends in the first place. why must we take things so hard when we can just forgive and forget and treasure this very friendship created in our very short life. sorry for the digression, back to where i was...after my futile attempt to pack my room i suggested to go msia watch movie, so bh contact our khakis, and den we went to panjang to meet them. but in the end nvr go msia. cos we all scared jam. so we when to town instead to watch the hulk. call me a marvel idiot or what, somehow i found it quite hilarious to watch the hulk running around, fighting small minions and another imitation hulk. maybe because of the size or what, its like kungfu dinosaur running around playing wrestling. 2 huge bulky hulks went lose stomping around..RAWRRR..!!! LOL. but it was nice. cant wait for the next sequel come out, so exciting. iron man was there!

2008-06-12T15:21:00.005+08:00

i finally officially graduated. currently waiting to go to sim-rmit to start on my degree.
i cant wait to start studying again.im so grateful for everyone that has been by my side this 19+ years of my life. although some came and went..but im still grately for them once been in my life. like a story, some fade away some appear again. they are still part and parcel that made me who i am now. it may be a sad story. but im glad lessons are learnt. experience are gained.
i dunno why. im just glad that i ever had those ppl in my life. hai. somehow i find it hard to maintain friends and make friends. i feel stuck even though i tried my best. i just find it difficult...then eventually everyone will leave me. kim, boo, steph, diana.... more...i dunno. they just seems to fade and disappear. i always wonder why. am i really such a horrible person. just dunno how to espress myself and maintain the friendship..hai.im a loser.

just came back from thailand wif peggy, lionel and my bestie cheng liang.. they are a hell bunch of happening ppl. haha. we booked our flight tixs like only 2 days before our flight. before we even knew it was happening, we were already flying off to thailand. we stay at khao san, rikku inn. like just above the happening streets of khao san. on the first day, we met lionel's thai fren, eve, she's one happening cute petite pretty lady. seriously. heard she's a model too. how cool is that.we went pubbing cum clubbing at night. 2nd day, shopping clubbing. 3rd day, shopping, the girls rejected clubbing and did hair extensions and tattoos. 4th day, home..): so fast right? but it was hell lotsa fun.

here are some picture taken from peggy's cam. her batt went flat on the 2nd day. dangs. the rest are wif lionel. haven ask from im yet.hm...well this are what i have for now.

Venue: Spore to Bkk
When: 2nd to 5th june 2008
Who: Lionel, Cheng Liang, Peggy and me

Purple's ciggs. cool shit.

At Bkk airport..finally we arrived!

Eating at a posh cafe on the first night.
They've got bear-shaped rice. added value for ambience.

this is the dope that we ate EVERY SINGLE DAY in thailand.
sorry chengliang..i know the smell is deeply imprinted in u cos u smell it even when ur asleep.LOL.

In Rikku Inn.slacking.those legs looks wrong.

DA MONSTER!!!! ahahaha...

entertaining ourselves wif iphone.

pegs and me,

E ladies room. so neat.

oops.got caught stretching my legs.

that all for now folks. will upload when i get the rest of the photos from lionel. ciaos.

2008-05-31T02:44:00.002+08:00

my first practical lesson today.

thank god i survived.

and it rained. my present for my first day of practical.it rained.

i stalled once and bike almost fell once..thats all. other than that i think im pretty much alright..

oh ya..i have problems bringing the bike to main stand too. so darn heavy.

when kallang to practice fake sparring.den went kallang to eat tim sum.wif ci min, winston, yuan n sj. sj say i fat. yuan say i fat. i really dont feel like eating. i keep thinking to myself. why i so fat. i know y. cos i eat a lot. but i cant stop eating. im such a glutton. i feel damn depressed being fat.fucking depressed.i hate being fat.den went mustafa get my emergency item. den went find ck2.den went home.

i emo-ing. no bucks. hungry.fat.cant eat. ahhgg.....so frustrated.hai ..talked to ck online.he just said i oily.say once say twice..okay leh..but they keep saying and making fun of me..im starting to doubt myself. im fat and oily. no one wants me. i think im really fat and oily...hai ... i always laugh and smile back at them laughin at me..but inside..like absorbed liao as time goes by with the increased frequency. i know they joking..but part of me is conscious..taking it seriously...hai.....ahhhhh. really feel like being bullimia. anorexia. feel like dying. ahhhhhhhhhh!

den sj just gt his bike tdy. happy fr him. yet worried at the same time. he nt used to the bike yet.and the bike nt used to him... he shldnt pillion anyone yet.dangerous fr himself..and fr the pillion. but he pillioned me tdy. as i promised to be his first pillion. and i was rushing fr time to go bbdc. my heart was beating v fast as i sat on his bike even thou i tried to cover up my nervousness and worries with laughter. den just now when home...still worried for him. gt this sixth sense he nt goin hm even thou he headed hm direction.. so decided to call him.1st time nvr pick up. 2nd time ring halfway rejected. pissed off. hate rejection. keep on worrying..cos he still new rider..sian. i wonder y i worry so much..if i gt bike i sure cfm acc him go anywhr he wan..rather than him alone travelling so late at night wit new bike. not tad i dun trust his skills or wad. just tad even experienced bikers might meet unexpected events whats more a new biker.. at least if not alone..anything happen still gt experienced biker ard to help.hai..worry too much. sian...until now still will think of wad i kicked...

dear dear goin fr amazing race tml..hHAhahaha..wonder if he gt stamina a not..he so long nvr exercise le. sure tired easily one..somemore so early in the morning..he slp so late..dunno can wakey n reach by 8 am. so cute.! suddenly tell me he join amazing race. . made me laugh..lol..

2008-05-27T04:21:00.002+08:00

hm. second post of the night.
i got acid burn in my throat, tummy and lungs.
so clever me thought of eatin gastric pills to neutralise the acid.
thus i ate my gastric pills, finding that they taste weird. i checked the expiry date and found out they were 5 months way past the expiry date.!! oh man. i ate expired medicine. dumb fuck.

2008-05-27T02:15:00.003+08:00

sigh..

so stressed up lately.
i lost my samsung earpiece.my ipod spoilt.my song hp yet to be repaired due to cashflow problems.all these require money.and im jobless.adding on to the weight are my class 3 and 2b licences..which also requires money. fuck money. it does make the world go around. without money we all are like body without souls.i wanna sell myself to money.den i will have all the money in the world. but money wont make me happy.so i say fuck money. fuck u.

conpleted my basic theory 1.01 and 1.02 one shot today. and i almost died.
boring like hell and 1.01 teacher keep shooting me..as if i gt ques. cos i the smallest female rider among the 4 others in the class.dumb ass.i kept fiddling around and fidgeting in my seat.just to stay awake.matamis love came find me during my 10 mins break just to pass me chocolate and sweets to help me stay awake. den watch me eat the home cooked matamis brought for me before i continued my 1.02 lesson. oh man..such a darling. he even came down before my 1.01 lesson started to pass me things.den head off for dinner wif his family. during my 1.02 lesson.. i met my secondary sch fren.darrell.ns guy.was quite shocked.long time no see. the instructor was less boring but v v v lame. went to meet him after tad at wm coffee bean wheere he was studying wif his classmates. helped him wif his assignment and den i headed home..was so hungry tad i packed food home to eat. satisfied. i cant imagine sleeping hungry.

baked healthy low calories milo cupcakes(less sweet). shared them wif frances and bh..hope they like it.

2008-05-22T13:07:00.002+08:00

everytime i walk home.
i see my block no. 520...
i will think of the day..5may 20th.
oh no oh no.
cant stop thinking of u.ahhhhhhh,,,,

damn it.
my tummy damn bloated la.and keep having the "on-off" gush of acute pain.
feels like shit.but its not coming out.sobrang nakaka inis...
and i keep eating like a baboy..so food keeps goin in but nothings coming out.
oh man...this is bad. my body will be intoxicated by food..which will den bcome shit.

yes yes yes!! its finally raining..can u smell the rain.?! woohoo..some showers to cool down the extremely blazingly humidly hot weather. the temperature can cook. the tthought of being sticky and sweaty all the times sucks. but now that its raining..im stuck at home. dangs!
man can never be satisfied.
thats why there is always partings..
no matter what.
oops..the rain's making me a bit melancholy.
i suddenly have the strong urge to run into the rain like before and play my hearts out.
i wonder pple now are so dock dock one..keep saying playing in the rain not gd..later fall sick.. now the medical so advanced fall sick also can recover one wad..furthermore.if so easy fall sick..den no need to go water parks and play liao. so i say ppl are dock dock when they tell me not to play in the rain. DOCK DOCK!

2008-05-21T01:08:00.007+08:00

haven been home lately.esp at night.
mom's been complaining..saying she will call police to report case of missing daughter.
oh man.not tad bad right? i only 1 day nvr go home.
okay.maybe quite bad.
insomia.ive been having fr the past few weeks.
how u expect me to stay at home and slack. when i cant even sleep.
i wonder why.
i asked.
pple tell me that i think too much. maybe i did.
maybe not. i dunno.
maybe yeah..

all the things that i have been having.
how can i nt think too much.
rejection.no one wants it.but its unavoidable.receiving it at times u wished that there was no such thing in the world. but it is such thing that makes the world real. because it gives you a pinch of pain that smacks u right back into reality. "hey hey hey,,this is no heaven.nothing is perfect." hai..i feel like goin to a corner and emo.why?why is it always so difficult to be happy. i always tell myself and others to count our blessings..why do i forget happiness so fast. why does saddness overcome me so easily.

thank you so so soo much for the box..the white burnt lavender flowers..the msg..the very meaningful stars and hearts..the chocolates(even thou i so chubby alr u still give me chocolates to eat).very sorry i cried. i know i was supposed to be happy..but a strong gush of emotions just took me away after seeing all those things u gave me..i felt touched.heartache.happiness.saddness.all at the same time.thanks for letting me cry. and letting me hug u as i cried.giving me tissue to wipe my tears..sorry i fell aslp on u. when u came back i bet i was alr knocked out.thanks for not wakin me up and letting me sleep.sharing the sweet doughnut i bought fr u tgt. matamis-ka. just like honey.thank you.

saying says there is no reason for love.no reason for loving someone. Thus, there is also no reason for not loving someone. love works in a funny way.if it happens.it happens. if it does not. sometimes no matter how hard u try. it doesnt happen. so why make it so diff fr urself and fr the other party. when u can both stay on gd terms and remain as frens instead of trying so hard and hurting each other in the end.

btw..i finally have the answers to your qns.sorry for taking so long. to me. they are impt. i dont want to rush myself in giving a quick reply and not meaning what i reply. and these answers dont come easily.it took me lots of thinking and qns myself.

1. Why wouldnt you give the guy who loved you for 7 years a chance?
->the answers is up there.

2. How come everytime when i got a burning question i sms you den always nvr recieve a reply. (You know silence can kill)
->silence does kill. but replying for the sake of replying kills more painfully. i rather i take my time to think of what to reply and to reply sincerely and honestly.i apologise that sometimes i think too long and forgot to reply. my bad. seriously.

3. If i leave for 8 years and come back after, would you still remember me?
->what do you think?

so tired.that i took the wrong toothbrush to brush my teeth.
and i realised my gold stud is turning silver. ahhh..!

2008-05-12T17:33:00.003+08:00

hm..my first official day out of job.

oh man..it really sucks for a workaholic like me.
sitting down slacking..like waiting fr death like tad.

so i decided to make my nails..

den i regretted..cos they were kinda long.
i forgot to make them shorter first.oh well..have to live with it.
den i realised i cant wear my contact lens with them and i've gt kickboxing training tml.
oh man..i guess i will shadow box first.

so boring..being stuck at home.
lacking sleep yet cant get to slp.
maybe bcos i fear sleeping..i fear the nightmares i might get.
after that fateful day when i kicked some unknown object.

oh man...............
so bored.
tad i went to make heart shaped chocolate..
i wonder who to give it to..
not everyone appreciates the food i make.
some ppl i give them food.is fr them to put inside fridge and rot one..
lol
i think theey dun dare eat..
tad time i made a chocolate heart fr my fren..his mom threw it away say its inedible! ):

wad to do fr the rest of the day...sigh...

2008-05-06T03:50:00.003+08:00

upsetted.
what is happening to me?
is it really tad hard for me to do the right thing?
why am i always on the wrong side of things.

i feel so so so sooo soooooo sad.
hai.i just feel so sad.
cant help it.oh man, :(

a lot of things happened lately.
my forehead really wu hei sia.
fall down.competition.work.things i buy.lost ciggs.injuries.health.relationships.
i lost my fuckin nb cb passport.shit.
den now.my new hp kanna water again
y all my hpS kanna water one.knn ccb..fuck la.

hai.....ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.......
so frustrated.

i hope i can get over this rocky period, moment of my life soon.
someone save me.
if u are the one. pls do so.

and. i think someppl should settle their own problem first before trying to help others solve their problem.how u can you/want to help others when u cant even help urself in the first place.

2008-05-02T06:04:00.002+08:00

die.
this is it.
im experiencing it again.
what the hell is happening man?

what happened to superhero boo.?
boo..save me!!

oh gawd..missing you like crazy already.
but it wasnt that long ago.

2008-04-29T13:43:00.001+08:00

recently.
lot things happened.
happy sad.

-haikus.

too tired to write..

2008-04-21T15:35:00.002+08:00

feel down from riding bicycle recently..
gt bruises on my neck tad looks like love bite.
scratches on my chin, knee, leg and ankle.
my elbow feels weird and had a funny bump.
wonder if its alright.have cracking sound whenever i move it.
oh my..wad a fall. thanks to my playfulness.haha.
went fishing.wif ck and yuan.
caught fishes and amazing clams and lots of rubbish.
i wonder why i always fish rubbish outta the canal.lol.
me and ck already had our catch. left yuan only.
lol.

ytd had friendly match at serangoon cc.
its was okay.
i didnt use much of jab. cos of the bad elbow i had from the bad fall.
plus i had fever the night before. and it sorta sucks.
i practicaly broke record. i actually went home at 8pm to slp..
like first time in many many months i went home so early.and actually SLEEP.
oh well..i can say i did not bad fr the match given my condition.
but well..nt everyone thinks so.but who cares.im fighting for myself. not for anyone else.
seriously. i think she's not tad gd. her kicks are a bit disorganised and her punches are quite weak.and for me..i didnt jab much..and didnt rush in. cos whenever i stick to her. we both will get stuck. i cant get out.cos she will stick to me too..i wonder y.i really need to work on my footwork more.like MOre. they suck big time. i nvr side step.oh well..still gt competition near the end of the yr.faster get well frm my fall..and train harder ba.

recently not in very gd mood..
but still must put on happy face.
a bit tired.
oh well, jia you jia you.
tml will be a better day.
count my blessings.be grateful fr wad i have.

2008-04-05T01:21:00.002+08:00

went msia today.
drank coffee bean.
bought my Vivi magazine as usual.
cabbed.
felt refreshed at my destination. ate kfc.
played arcade.
shopped.bought a bra.
walked ard like in own world.
not caring how ppl look and think.
like escape from the stress.
secret recipe.cakes n yummy drinks.
ignoring the calories.plus fats.
cabbed.bus.

oh ya.
i jibaboom-ed on the bus.was drinking water.humps.
and i was all wet.must be the poor drainage.

everytime also gt sth happen one..tad time is scan passport wrongly.

holland v.class reunion.touched.
yh.fiona.leann.cs.timo.lydia.eugenia.me.
oh well..plus celina.guest appearance.lol.
deja vu.gossips.misses..

boo = <3

2008-04-04T01:36:00.003+08:00

so frustrating...this isnt a way to love someone.

u r strangling me so tightly tad i can hardly breathe.

hai.dunno wad to say or do.

it seems like things are forcing me to do and say things i dun wish to.

anyways.

tad day when swimming.i did the dumbness thing.

i wore my swimming cap..at home.

den wore my cap over it, and went out to go swimming.

i look fucking funny. i bet pple who saw think im mad or weirdo.

i seriously look funny wif my swimming cap.

here..laugh.

2008-03-31T01:58:00.003+08:00

saturday went to msia wif sch amb.
like really early in the morning. seriously. 6 30 must reach sch.
i slept at lik ard 3 plus den nid to wake up at 5..but i ended up wakin at 6 cos i lia chuang.
den woke up rushed to bathed n pack my things.i haven even changed ringgit yet la.luckily im a malaysian. cfm gt ringgit ard the house one.
oh ya..
something very funny happened at the customs.
i took my msia passport.went to the spore passport lane and tried to scan my passport.
omg. like so dumb. the worse is i still can stand there for at least 5 mins tryin to scan to no avail.
den i suddenly realised.im in the wrong lane.
and den back to the bus..i almost fell off my seat when i heard the tour guide said "welcome everyone here..so are you guys prepared for the MAKAN MAKAN TRIP??"
like..wth.no one told me it was a makan trip.i tot was like a trip to the mushroom farm and stuff.
no tad i dislike eating but the fact is tad i ate a lot the day before.
i ate double lunch and dinner.
anyways, so the story goes on..with eating..
eating and eating..
almost every half an hr to 1 hr..eat..
eat eat eat..
and i so the story ends wif me goin home wif a bloated tummy and lots of food and tibits fr my family.

and i so wanna buy tad espirit hoodie.Arg..so nice la.
and tad skinny from G2000..30++ bucks only. CHEAP cheap..

just now when fr my sista's singing contest.
he gt 2nd..wheets.not bad alr.
althou i expected him to get 1st.
i think hes gd.lol..
oh wells..congrats.at least i didnt waste my effort.
why do i say so?
cos i lied to my supervisor tad i was sick and didnt go to work
like so last min..
i feel like FUCKING CB bad la..
i dun like to do it and like my first time i think...but for my sista..i did it.
better be grateful k?!
but come to think of it.. im really sick anyways..
vomited like merlion last night ..at least i gt more time to rest.

and this one is specially to zh.
since i know u are reading my blog..
dun so fierce can?! i will take my medicine one.lol..
i know u care for me silly.u always say me..
u ownself also nvr tc of urself.
want me to nag at u ar?! PLEASE EAT UR MEALS.
even if u dun feel like.
dun tell me ur body needs to shit..but u no "appetite" so in the end nvr go toilet shit.
come on..ur body needs food even thou u no appetite to eat.so eat okay?!

2008-03-29T02:28:00.002+08:00

oh gawd.
im fucking tired.
today is saturday.
drank on saturday.
drank on monday.
drank on tuesday.
drank on wednesday.
drank on thursday.
at this rate im going..sure die one..
high chances of getting liver failure.
drink alcohol like drink water like tad.
i smell alcohol also feel like puking.
gawdamnitshit.

hai..and so many things happened these past week.
as though im in a dream.
actually i feel like im. groggy from all tad alcohol.
lack of slp..work n work.
im not only alcoholic but workoholic.
no wonder gt no bf.
and also lucky gt no bf.
if nt bf poor thing.

pardon me fr my vulgarity..
CB!!
fucking tired.
cannot take it le.. tml need to wake up fucking early like at 5AM..
i need tad beauty sleep.
i have an appointment with my darling ruffles in lalaland.
ciaos.laters..

i miss my white carebear.

2008-03-22T05:24:00.002+08:00

im a lucky person.
i got to experience what is love.waht is heart breakand i have many ppl ard me tad loves me.
and they love me for who i am..i hope.
whether i am fat or thin.
ugly or not..

talking about ugly.
if i was ugly..i bet no one will even set their eyes on me.
this is the cruel reality.
although often denied by many..
come on..its superficial.and everyone does it.
even i admit. if a person is ugly.
i wouldnt even notice the person or bother about the person in the first place.
the the cruel truth...im sure most of us do.
sub-consciously too.oops spell wrongly.?

anyways.the plan is.stay single and date.
until i can find someone that can sweep me off my feet totally.like TOTALLY..
and make me forget him.
btw..i haven broken my promise yet.
i dun understand y..
how can ppl bear to make promise which they break so easily.
if promises are mean to be broken.
y are there promises in he first place?
they only give false hopes.promises are evil.because they can be promises.
just like vows..
what are marriage vows?!
nonsense.!pple still get divorce and stuff.
y vow when they can actually be broken.

if u really make a promise or a vow..for bloody sake keep it..
haiz.sorry gt too carried away.
its okay. ppl makes mistakes...
but somehow they shld be and must be responsible for the mistakes they made..
and try to minimise and be responsible for the broken pieces created by the broken promises or vows.thas like the least they shld DO.

im so tired. im a bum.
i wanna be a useful person. but like cmi.
dumb fuck.

i love my gf cindy..
but somehow cindy have someone else alr.. someone i know..hai..

2008-03-20T20:42:00.002+08:00

its a wonder how fate works..
anyways, i decided. nows not the time.
im glad we are fated to meet.
but decided to stay where we are.
cos sometimes..
i rather be stay the way we are now..than try so hard and lose a fren so dear to me.
if it is really meant to happen. it will happen someday somehow. no matter how u avoid it.

been really sick lately.
must take really good care of myself. its a promise i made to someone.
time to grow up and learn to take care of myself. on my own.
thanks for everything u did.
im still learning..and trying to adapt.
guess its part and parcel of growing up..into adulthood.
responsibilities. a very impt thing.

KENNY!!!!! u finally msged me! im sooooo happy.
msg me more k?
i gt something to show u...
been with me for a long time.
but now i decided its time to let u know about it.

2008-03-17T01:36:00.002+08:00

so much has happened lately.
sighs.
i hear the clock tick tocking away..
time is running out for me.
i wonder how long more can i stay..
sad to see some ppl wasting their life away.

i have lots of things to do before i go.
so much to do.so little time...
pls grant me more energy and time.
but i still will pursue my dream sweet shop.
whether im in it alone or not.
i fear i do nt have enough time..and strength to do it. but i will try my best.
dare to live ur dreams.
i dont want to look back one day and regret that things that i shld have done but nvr did.

hm.
y do i feel weird ard u?
those endless waiting fr a msg.
slamming of hp everything i want to msg u.fearing i might be disturbing u.
a date that nvr became a date.
those sweet words from you.so sweet tad makes me shiver in fright whether you really meant it or not.
no matter what. i will always be by your side for you. like you did for me.
are you my superman? or just my friend?
i need to know.
will u give us a chance?
cos i really dont know how much time i have left.

2008-03-07T00:48:00.002+08:00

where is my superman?!!

so bored and tired.
okay.fine.im fat.too bad okay.
keep tellin myself to stop running away. but i keep doing so.
weakling.
come on. i know im much stronger than this.
fuck. just feel like fuck la. cb.

so tired of how things are.
wad am i?
im not as dumb/blur as u think i am.
i "see" things. i know things. no point tryin to hide.

so fucked up.

2008-02-21T17:58:00.002+08:00

damn sian.
so disappointed over some stuffs.hai.
forget it. i sleep wake up will get over it.
wonder y i so soft hearted.once again.i must try to harden my heart.
if not i will not survive.cos like almost everyone ard me all so......
well..obsessed with their self centeredness...hard hearted and practical.
why is it so hard to find someone tad is different..i think its the way we were brought up in this harsh society.the way we always were taught to face reality.
destroying the innocence souls of being.and what they really are.
its like as though we had a guideline to follow.everyone is moulded into what the society, what the govt wants us to be like.
we have lost our true self.

mmmm.....that soft sensual touch of you..caressing me tenderly.
sent me tingling in sensation.
that cold cold feeling..makes me erotic..as i thrust u slowly yet forcefully into me.
i could taste u so sweet..as i lick and suck greedily at u..
i swear...u are soo damn sweet..making me go into a state of estacsy.
craving for more..
as u erupted in me..totally orgasm...
omg..such a feeling..is really addictive.
once again, im craving for u..for u inside me..and that explosion..
damned.
im addicted.

Midnight cookies n cream.
a new flavor icecream i just got from hagen diaz. taste dmn gd.
should try....

2008-02-16T22:04:00.001+08:00

im not mentally ill.
im not.
im Not.
im NOT.

2008-02-16T02:17:00.005+08:00

to kenny: some things no need to say we all know in our heart can alr.
---------------------------
LESSON TO LEARN
WHEN PPL DO NOT COMMUNICATE. NOTE: Communication tools are made to BREAK.

Fuck. Damn Fucking pissed off. not the first time alr la.
damn fucking Disappointed. and it can happen twice in a day. i really damn damn upset.
dont lie to me. dont fucking lie to me. cos i know.
why and how i know..i also dont wan to know.i just know.
its not a special gift tad i wan.
its a curse.
i really dont wish to contact u anymore.
its hopeless. no point telling u or asking u anything anymore.
waited in pain la. shld have just took my medicine and go rest.
reason i dun wan take cos will get drousy n tired..i wan to study.
but fuck la.forget it..seriously. not even worth ur batt.
dont even have the decency to respect ur fren.
luckily, im ur fren.
cos i gave up.

-----------------------------
thanks for remembering me even when u are away.
i feel the love.

which also reminded me.
->thanks david for teaching me how to "feel the love"...i shared it wif cindy today.

2008-02-11T15:00:00.000+08:00

Happy Chinese New Year to all..
its been 1 yr already since the....broke up.
kinda sad.
broken promises.
shattered dreams.
forgotten love.

many things have happened since.
true..there was heart breaks that almost seems impossible to heal.
killing my dying soul and heart. but im glad.
cos i was counting my blessings.
i had my friends that pulled me outta the dark..out from hell..
they held my hands and walk with me slowly, guiding and supporting me with each limp i took.
i met many new friends. good and bad.
i experienced many things that was so out of the blue. those that you will only get to experience once in a lifetime. true that tears do come at night. true that there were times i thought i would nvr wake up the next morning. but somehow someway, with each step i took. there was always someone there for me. even though you thought there was no one. it is the matter of fact whether are you aware of their existence and be willingly to receive help from them.

i want to thank david and steph..they were the ones that ever so kindly and willingly extended their hands to me whenever i when to sch with a heavy heart. they saw my pain and agony in class.. and started talking to me and stuffs. david is a wonder preacher..trust me. got future. his words sometimes works wonder. and steph..always there for me...constantly giving me "wake up" calls to the reality. i am really so glad.even though both of us are kinda drifting apart which i dont know why..but i will always treasure our friendship. the times david , steph and me had..those aimless driving, supper, outings..will always be a part of me. in my memories..

then there came along ken, joleen, cindy and gang..they were also there for me..making me laugh..allowing me to temporarily forget my troubles. ken and david together are classics with their cold jokes. and david's day was friday while ken's was monday, wednesday..those hang outs, ard the island food buffet, those jamming, esp eating sessions, muggings nights, unsuccessful pinic..i will also nvr forget. although its kinda sad that the gang has broken up due to some internal conflicts. if only everyone could sit down and listen to each other and understand..well, nth is forever. there will always be break ups.my pt-gf cindy...i love her lots. she's my savior..always there for me..like seriously.always.i was crying frantically ytd at home.and she took cab all the way down to save me.im like so touched.really love her lots.
there was also diana..who always understood me.im so blessed to have someone who really does.it wasnt easy to find someone who do..i think we have some similiar problems too...then i gotta know sijie and gang..they..a bit childish.lol..everytime i look at them..there were those typical poly guys..doing things wad a typical youngster/"ah bengs" will do..just that they dont fag. but its okay. let them enjoy their youth while they still can. haha. there was also anthony.tad mad guy.motorbike trips..and sth happened.see la..play somemore. look at the road.and he is mad. really. like seriously. wanna take me go geylang n sell. lol.. more like i take u go sell..haha..BOO! haha.how can i miss him out. met him though my fren qihao at zouk. i rmb his geeky specs and face..and his split personality, Xiao Qiang! haha..the first date we had..we had a long long date..like 15 hrs?..and we found money! and those crazy nights. . u mad ppl..kidnap me dont let me go home.! haha...and shui sheng's bouncy bouncy smack smack..forgot his name's cute kitten..endless dotas..drives ard..science centre..movies..And I Love shopping wif boo..he is the one guy tad any girls will enjoy shopping wif.cos he gives constructive fashion critics and things and he is damn direct. ugly means ugly..lol..and boo..everytime we go out. we spent most of our time eating.! FOOD food food.. now u all know how i grew fat. fat boo is also scared of cockroaches. lol..like damn fucking scared. not forgetting is over suspicious mom..haha..who comes in like every 15 mins to "do sth"..boo is also lazy. keep saying wanna meet up but until now haven meet up yet. LAZY boo! almost forgot 80% alcohol..those alcoholic nights. haha..i saw them grew..leandro daddy got married. shaun got a gf. dihban and leroy and arron broke ups. and stuffs. now mummy is having a baby...but we r drifting apart.

and there was ben..my dear benboo. who is in NS now..poor botak ben. miss him lots. he..hm..he...i duno what and how to say..i can only say i love this guy lots.haha..he and his silly digging nose joke. wad a jerk la.! how can like tad make fun of ppl..lol..but its funny la.we had lots of silly-make-no-sense-nonsense-but-funny talks.and drinking at pubs..hearing him sing..and being vain abt himself..and kbox.hha.so shy.first time sing wif guy alone.and hey! when are we goin to zoo.? we alr saw "retarded" dolphins. when are we goin to ZOO! haha.i will wait fr u..u better not run away.

another important people are sinclair, jo, jo's mum, ricco, kim..these were my party mates. those drunk nights, morning breakfast..those partys..private events..dress ups..make-ups..piercing..tattoos..shopping..low profile but high end restaurant with the best beer..laughter, dancing, mad dares..life talks..haha..sure did made my life an interesting one.doin things a wild crazy teen would do. and jo.. our little "luxurious" getaway holiday..those cycling..fishing..swimming..eating..haha..simple yet relaxing..we were living like kings and queens.lol.period!

there was also my family members..my mom that gave up on my consistent and persistent cryings everyday..and my sis that asked me go out with her.. to keep me occupied.and ginger..who sometimes comes to lick my tears away.but they were ever so understanding..even though i always nvr go home..fagged and stuffs..

i wanna thank everyone so much.including those i missed out..cos there was so much to be thankful for.im quite blessed..
true.there is no denial i still miss you.
but i hope tad you will not take my love fr you and play wif me.

life is a nvr ending learning journey.
some experience and learn more and faster than others.
but be grateful for everything u have now. cos once lost.it hard to go back to where u were.
treasure.
i know its hard to believe. but there is karma.

2008-02-04T10:22:00.000+08:00

my heart breaks for you..
stay with me.
i know im selfish.but just stay.
dont leave me just yet.
wait till i come back from msia k?

hey.this is wrong.im missing you.
its so wrong.
stay single stay single stay single.
im not going into a r/s.anyway, i guess its impossible too.
i guess its just absence that makes the heart grows fonder.

2008-01-29T01:42:00.000+08:00

argh!
i wanna slam the wall and kick the doors.
wonder why i try so hard not to cry.
wonder why i try so hard to accept the facts.
facts are the truth.
FUCK them.
why must there be such a thing called cancer.
why does cancer exist.
why must cancer exist.
why cant it be cured easily without pain and suffering.
i hate u stupid cancer.
go away.just go away and fuck off.
its so heart breaking...
but i gotta be strong.so must you.
lets try to fight it together.
i know how much you must have dread facing it too.
but there is no choice..
i hope you will stay with me a little longer.
just a little longer.. .
i love you.

2008-01-18T01:31:00.001+08:00

why am i crying again.
why did i hurt someone again.
why why why.

why dont u love me again.
why is my superman not appearing.
WHY.

2008-01-15T22:56:00.000+08:00

the rain poured like my heart do.
feel so empty.
who am i. what am i.
y do i feel so stranded.
where is my superman?

2008-01-14T15:27:00.000+08:00

love me again. and again.

guess what.i give up losing weight.
its hopeless.

its sad.
my old illness is back.
i find it hard.or rather harder and harder to talk to ppl again.
each time i try.it just gets worse.
whenever i talk.no one seems to bother about me.
ppl seems to be shunning me for some reasons.
and my brain is not functioning well again.
i seems to be getting slower and slower..
my brain takes longer to register and digest info..i have difficulties interpreting what ppl are saying.like..my customer ordered 2 ice cream..i wont catch it and ask again..they tell me one flavor..i scoop another flavor.this is damn bad alr..

im sick again..
help.

2008-01-14T00:12:00.000+08:00

i am the Best thing that ever happened in your life.
there will always be Me in you till the end of time.

2008-01-11T18:24:00.000+08:00

i hate myself.
why am i here man.
hai.
wish i was invisible.

2008-01-05T10:58:00.000+08:00

oh no oh no oh no..
say this isn't true.
tell me i am not in love.
tell me its just a crush.

ArGhh..!
she blows my mind.
the way she smiles.
the way she speaks.
the way she looked at me when i talk.
Shit.
my heart almost stopped beating.
someone save me pls..

no more cheri......
its ker....for me.
ker i like so much better..the way she swept me iff my feet just like tad.
but i am scared.
the way she looks at me..
the look in her eyes.
somewhat tells me that its impossible.
there is someone else there already...
i just a little too late.

but still.
finally someone set my heart blasting tru space.

2008-01-03T22:45:00.000+08:00

Picture of the day:
Jap giant spider crab V.S. One butted ben

went to sentosa with benboo..

he was like so late.

haha..finally i am not late.lol.

went to pink dolphin lagoon..underwater world..cine magix and cine blast..

hahah..

has fun the most at underwaterworld...thanks to those rays..so sick..

felt so slimy, wet and rubbery..sucking at your fingers. eew...if it wasnt for boo i wouldn't even dare to put my hands in.apparently..boo actually liked the feeling..heh heh.

and i saw the mermaid..a really fat one. as fat as me..

the dugong.

yes..not forgetting the pink dolphin.so fat too. yes yes yes...like me.

but i am not pink. the way they pass the ball using their flippers was darn cute.

totally amazing.

and boo..pls stop the dig nose thing.i know its funny but its gross la.lol.u dont need to do tad to the poor fish too..haha..tad fish really can stone.puny fishes can even swim in and out of its gapping mouthing...

no more noses stuffs.

later i get nightmares den u know.

and u are smiling in ur sleep...wad u dreaming of?.....

2007-12-31T15:31:00.000+08:00

Happy New Year in adavance.
sorry..gtg work.
at siloso beach party..

sorry my dear benboo..
feel bad for not being able to meet up with u again and again..
no worries.........
will meet u soon.
love ya too! <3

2007-12-28T00:43:00.000+08:00

not so happy xmas..and it sure was a merry xmas.
got drunk.
oh well.fuck it.i dont care.
it was crap 2007.
thanks to r/s and stuffs.

so im declaring myself SINGLE BUT NOT! AVAILABLE.
all of u pls stop asking me.i am NOT going to go into any relationships.so just leave me alone.
i am not ready yet.
dont emo in front of me.
i hate emo stuffs.
and guys out there..pls treat girls with more respect.
i mean..its not ur feelings alone.
the other party also have one okay?!
think before u do anything.
hurt urself nvm..dun hurt others as well.

im very tired.
need rest.
bye.

2007-12-10T19:29:00.000+08:00

xmas is coming.
instead of snowing.its raining.but i like.
somehow, the thought of hugging someone to sleep in this cold weather is tempting.
but i brushed the thoughts away.
no way am i going to go through all the partings again.
if there is no beginning, there will be no partings.

oh well!
season to be jolly..

list of things to make me happy.either for xmas or my bday.
here it goes...(:

Leepeng's wishlist:
[Warning.! the following content may be explicit and is painfully long and might cause one to enter into a state of bankruptcy.]

okays..let's start simple.. to lessen the damage..

[No or little harm done]
-whip up a delicious meal
-bake a cake for me
-send me a card
-sing for me
-hug me
-exchange greetings
-date me out
-write a letter to me

[bearable injuries]
-delicious chocolatess!
-treat me yummy jap food
-take to me to a concert
-organise a surprise mini party
-shoes(im size 6 1/2)
-clothes
-board games
-books(preferred choice-cook books.inspiration books)
-nice accessories
-alcohol
-a tub of ice cream(must NOT contain wheat)
-shopping vouchers

[Major injuries]
-perfumes..perfumes...& more perfumes..(ralph lauren..escada..lanvin..dior..babydoll..)
-alcohol
-M.A.C. makeups
-Kose Xmas limited edition makeup palette
-rose gold colored watch
-Dresses
-LaSenza boots/lingerie
-unique musical box
-Polaroid Camera

[EXTREMELY harmful Damages Inflicted]
-Osim Uzap
-Digital Camera
-new sleek small and thin handphone
-Supplement card for my free spendingo($.$)o
-Slimming pills/treatment
-Braun Buffel things
-Take me on a short holiday overseas(a 1-night stay at banyan tree bali?>.<)
-Real Car that i can drive around with(maybe i will then be motivated to get my license)
-AIYA!..just give me your money....AHahahahaaa.....

what i really want is priceless.happiness.laughter around me.everyone to be healthy.and stop cheating on each other.

2007-12-04T01:08:00.000+08:00

i love my job at New zealand natural @ sentosa imbiah.
jia you
goals: dont be late for work
work harder.
make customers smile more.

i hate myself.
i just do.
why cant anyone ard me be happy?
am i such a jinx.
leave me alone to die.
Slash plus relaxtant anyone?

2007-11-05T23:57:00.000+08:00

i met a guy not long ago.
talked to him today.
he's amazing.gave up passion to stay low.
i talked to boo today.
boo's a copy cat.
we both shared the same pain.
but he's still a pain in the ass.
i talked to an old fren today.
he's bcum a changed person.

so when will i make an impact in my own life again.
i wan it to be a gd one.

2007-11-05T00:16:00.000+08:00

as the golden lights touch the blue
slowly slogging away at the cold
silent whispers left unheard
frozen fingers thawed
flowing, bursting out of the vaults
red and smooth they were
like river gushing down the streams
a tree lost in amazon
thousands birds migrating
single egg in the nest
but only to be consumed by man
now bare and short it stood
only god can touch it life again.

2007-11-01T02:10:00.000+08:00

HALLOWEEN was Fun!
haha.
most successful year of Trick or treat.
Cindy and me had ard 2 kg worth of sweets.Muahahaha.!
i love my cindy.w/o her. halloween will be holloween.

btw.
my immune system is down again.
fucking sick.fuck man.i know im vulgar.
but heck.
so busy la.sch.work.training.
dont even have time to play.n enjoy my youth.
made.
i need some time to breathe la.den pressures to satisfy everyone.
gawd.cant u all just stop buggin me.saying im bad.nvr do my work. not responsible enuff.im dao.im crazy.workaholic.wad so ever crap.
u give me money i dun work la.
u buy me time so i can do my work n not be so dao.
u take away my goldfish memories so i can rmb to be resopnsible la.
not everyone is lucky to live a normal or gd life.
some just have to live it the hard way.
Stop making it worse for them.

the harsh reality:
ppl who u love. dun love u.
ppl who u have no interest in. like u.
ppl whom u treasure the most. often get lost.
ppl whom u try so hard to protect. oftern get hurt by u in the end.
the one who u love the most. will hurt u the most.
and the list goes on............

when will you come to me.
i will be willing to give up wad i have now just for ur love.
why did god create such a thing called love.?
why must be in such a way tad it heals, protects and comfort..yet at the same time hurt, destroy and infect.

i know i can never have you.

2007-10-23T23:40:00.000+08:00

why do you even bother when you already know what's still goin to happen in the end..
Seriously.
WHY BOTHER? and hurt yourself more.

NEWS UPDATE:
CAN KENNY.R PLEASE COLLECT YOUR BIRTHDAY PRESENT FROM LP GENERAL OFFICE ASAP PLEASE. ITS ROTTING AWAY.

2007-10-07T01:26:00.000+08:00

im glad i finally got to meet cindy at ken's bday party after so long..
but den i know i can nvr be her gf...sadded..she's gt this alex thing...
everytime she talks abt her i get jealous......hai..oh well.i sucks.
and jie...whom i tot was diff frm the others...is actually not.im shocked.i really dunno wad to say.
jie is nt the jie i tot i knew...seems lik i dunno him tad well.my detector spoilt alr.mayb cos his was gone long ago.den gt kickboxing..fish fish thing..work..ambass..den bestie bday.he seems so sad everytime i cant fulfill his wishes..so pressurised..all so stressed la.makes it seems lik my fault tad i arent able to meet up to all ur expectations.im just a normal girl.i cant possibly satisfy everyone!..y cant u all just give me a break.its holis.MY holis.cant u all just let me rest before i begin my last lap in ngee ann.im goin crazy.cld had gone on holis to thailand..but due to certain obstacles....cldnt.tot i cld finally take a break from all this shit tad happened to me since tad fateful day..but seems lik the problems have just only started.why?! everyday i just hope to pass each day like the rest.but it just sucks in the end.when can i ever be normal again? i try to be optimistic..but i feel lik im the liar and best actress in the world.i hate emo ppl.they make me feel even more sad and horrible.i cant seem to be able to overcome the barriers in me physically and psychologically..im tired. can u ppl just leave me alone.i need rest...almost fainted from exhuastion.i was forcing myself not to black out.i even rejected boo to hang out tgt.gtg.the dizziness coming back..

been a long time since i cried again.
although i am not a christian..but i believe god has plans for us for everything tad happened to us.i hope tad god will relief me of this complicated situation i have now.give me strength to carry on and overcome my barriers.i pray that god will give me a second chance to live life normally and forgive for my terrible sins which i had committed foolishly back then.allow me time to redeem myself and please guide me back to normal life.i also pray i will hear and see less of "weird" stuffs...God, in you i believe in.cos i have faith in you. even though things dun always turn out the way u wanted them to be or prayed for..but i believe its god humbly taking up the task of choosing and creating a better path for us to walk on..

2007-10-04T23:58:00.000+08:00

i went for hair treatment.yay.finally.happy happy..
ytd mos was a blast.
for the first time.it wasnt tad crowded.
met new frens too..and 4 pervertic but cute jap guys.

here are some pics..

yupps...the 2 above are mighty n hello(carlo xD)...

i wan lose weight................................i am fat.

omg..and btw. im Totally not photogenic at all. i just dun look right in pics.

And..how to market and sell fresh fish.omg.wad a challenge..

anyone gt any idea?